I am so Thai right now

The Chao Phraya flows upstream this evening.

There must be a big coconut tree round here somewhere because the river is full of them. Bobbing up and down on a journey to god knows where or why.

How Thai.

Anyway, back to me.

This bit of long story but, many many things have happened today. This is the story of the monsoon rainy morning, the military band, the missing amulet, the fake jade monkey, the Wat Po, my roadside kitchentress, my ferry across the Chao Phraya to the temple of the dawn across the river.

Also I went fishing today.

The idea is to catch them by hand but more of that later.

We headed out early into a deluge. Came straight back in and accepted the offer of matching umbrella.

Out we went on to Song Wat road. The band was waiting.




"We" asked them to play the theme to the lion king but they didn't know it. I even hummed the first few bars. They all just laughed and said " you don't need us you really good on your own".

 

 

Off to Amulet street.

This is the amulet I bought.

Apparently I will not have any problem at custom office.

 

 

At the Wat po



This one just a trinket...


You go by boat up a canal. Stop by a bigger boat and transfer. Then a man in Thai fisher pants and bare chest covered in tattoo of dragons and fish and gold rings on all his fingers says in perfect Thai "who want to catch the fishy? "

One of us didn't understand my answer or his question but next thing I know I am standing next to him, bare chested and in Thai fisher pant only on a wooden meshed deck over an australian backyard swimming pool size tank of dark water that moved with the motion of the boat.

He started to chant and we began to be lowered into the water. He leaned in to me and whispered " keep your pants on pharang and just relax".

The water was body temperature and smelt like a brand name dry cat food.

We went in up to my shoulders and everything was quite. I could see the grey Bangkok sky up above us where people were standing around on the sides of the tank.

This them



 

 

They were holding golden urns and seemed happy. My fishing companion called out something like "Now now now" and they all emptied the urn into the water.

 

It was a bit scary at first.


 

this me and the fishertresses down in the water.

then the fishes came out

I still cannot speak about it....

This my tattooist

 

yes that is a bamboo needle

 

and this is shrine for the shy I went to

and this is the dog that lives at the shrine of the shy and yes I let her sleep

these are past students. The did very well.

 

I climbed to the top metaphysically

 

 

I saw this

I felt this

 

and I stayed up for

my last moon in the Bang

 




I will be home for the full moon

 

 

chocks away ground crew

 

love and peace

Mruk

I live on the Chao Phraya

The Loy la Lang guest house is between the Wat and the river. Our rooms are of timber and bamboo and have cushions that fold in threes and antique looking things to hang ones thai fisher pant from ( shoes at the door thank you farang).

The living space we have has a balcony which hangs out over the river.



 

There is always something afloat on the river. The long fins look exotic, the gin palaces look like gin palaces and the ferries look ready to ferry you anywhere.

 

I love the river. It calls me to make a canoe. I will try on Monday afternoon.

It is tidal which surprised me given how much I know about the rivers of the world. Go on, ask me a question?

 

did I mention the temple at my door?

actually, this Wat has a relic of an abbot in it. It is supposed to be his ear bone ( the hammer ? ) and that is why this Wat is known locally as the listening house of the god.

 

 

What a day it was. By train to the chatachuk, or the jatujuk, or the JJ markets we went.

Our hearts were pure, our minds were fresh, our wallets safe from pocket pickers and our bags are from strong jute and at the ready.

Had not even got out of the rail station before I had bought my first genuine hand made afghani artifact. There is a lot of afghani in the chatachuk of the Bang. There is a lot of everything in the Chatachak. It is a bit like the Camberwell market in Melbourne but good.

It took me 35 minutes to restock this after you know who said " can I have that one? "


I have bought all my friends a broom.

Don't argue about which color you want, I got 27 of the purple ....

Next time you are in Bangkok try carry 27 brooms and 3 genuine antique afghan kilim bags home on the metro. The security checks were a little intrusive. We all had to wear gloves...

It was nice to get bak to the Loy la Lang

This the front of the place

 

 

This the power plants that runs the air machine and the

That runs the house. You only have to stand near it with a jug of water and it boils.

This the gardens inside of our riverside rooms;

These the big things at the park up the Thanon song wat.

You know how in Europe the street theater people do the stand still thing for hours in the blazing sun while dressed as a Caesar or a pharaoh or a Napoleon but still look crap ?

In the Bang they really good. I thought this was real statue until he let off gas. That why I laughing and he looking sideways....

a Thai mystic lives in here.

I dunno wat.

I like a blue cloudy Thai sky. I remember it always.

Very shiny stuff.

so much gold

A bit wooden I thought.

I love the Bang.

I have a kitchen here. I make best Farang pad Thai ever according to houseboy number three. He has given up drinking and staying up late and dancing in clubs and really likes working as houseboy number three. He loves watching me cook. I a bit nervous when he helps chop up the onions. The choppy choppy things goes faster than the eye and onions become mince in seconds.

Time for my kick boxing lesson at the boxertress happy healthy centre.

I can feel things like Thai now.

 

Love and peace

Mruk.

 

In the land of the hill tribes

I love Chaing Mai.

It is a bit like a wet but hot spring in the Richmond bit of Melbourne.

Btw, there used to be elephants at the bit of Richmond that is Burnley just over the road from my school of higher learning.

I went elephant hunting.

That bloke in the hat behind me was a bit odd but a talented man none the less.

He could pick up peanuts, bananas and bread rolls with his penis. Not all three things at once I should point out. That would be unbelievable.

He was an elephant whisperer as well.

After a few lessons I can now, with a bit of a run up manage a donut. The peanuts require a considerable amount of concentration. And just when you think you have a firm grip on it/them someone in the audience coughs or, the elephant pinches it.

I still like elephants though.

 

I have a confession.

Today I went to an "authentic" hill tribe village open to the public and a "special" place.

It was a mystery to me.

I am on the way to waterfall number 14. It is guarded by a Thai hill tribe princess called " Mae nam waterfalltress".

She liked me and let me go in the river.

I am in number 14.

This was stuck to me in my Thai fisher man pants front room area when I returned from waterfall 14.

The waterfalltress had to remove it for me.

I had to stand perfectly still whilst she slid a bamboo spatula between it the skin. This has to be done at the exact same speed as the cephalopod moves or else it gets agitated and releases thousands of tiny barb shaped spears from it giant 20cm long foot into whatever it is sliding along on. There wasn't a lot of room to move but the waterfalltress has good eyes and a firm but fair hand for both man and the giant snail. I still have an ugly bruise.

I recovered quickly.

 

Get'n air Chaing Mai style after the incident of the snail, the spatula, the awkward moment and the bruise...

 

Just about now I got the wave from the hired gun who drove us around that it was time for a Chaing Mai chaser and spring roll...he dropped us at hippie street in the old village, (fuck knows why ) and split for monk school. I bought two bikes and a gorgeous antique bag in good old hippie street Chaing Mai and we then split for the ban boo lang.

We parked our bikes under the banyan




tree and I drank beer with French people from France whom, after a few bubbly drinks told me every secret they had. I have that effect on the French. They have never been up the Eiffel tower was one another is a little controversial.

I love Chaing Mai

 

goodbye Chaing Mai

Hello Bangkok

Love and peace

M

 

Chaing Mai

Melbourne and Chaing Mai have a lot in common.

The elephants caused me to come to this place.

Actually it it was only one elephant. Her name was Queenie the second and she lived at the Melbourne zoo. I rode her around the elephant walk in the garden part of the Melbourne royal zoological gardens.

 

This is a Kodak image of me on Queenie 2 .

 

I am the one second from right facing away.

 

Anyway.....

This is the shrine to the elephants outside our room at the Ban Boo Loo guest house traditional style pretty house in the trees....

 

 

The monsoon falls from the clouds and the squirrels run across the rafters just because they can.

This our room from the street.

 

 

This from inside

 

 

Very much happy inside.

 

 

Thai language quite tricky to spell, I can speak it ok but is hard for me to type because is hard for me to spell the clicking and some other noises made with the tongue and roof of mouth and sharp exhale of the breath while talking is hard for me to explain.

Talking funny noises I make one today. I just had lunch at taste of heaven vegetarian (fish not meat in Thai) restaurant and remember my credit card stored in safe place. The flexiteller at 123 phukadukaluka st.....

thank godness in the monsoon night sky for the landline, the skype, the whatsapp and the bar wench from Rosanna.

Take home message from that event." never try and do two things at once at autoteller in chaing Mai". Leave that to the ladies.

did I mention the wats...

This the wat around the corner

this the sleeping dogs wat sleep and only wake up when the chanting stops.

this brick stupa traffic light changes colors when the chanting stops and starts.

I walked around it three times.

Then I went to the night markets. I bought the night. It is all mine now.

and a few men's drinks.

 

Today is Thursday. It is a special day.

We go to see Abu the baby elephant at the elephant baby natural elephant reserve for elephants.

I have a huge bag of peanuts.

Napoleon

Whilst onborard AF 166 to Bangkok I had time to think of things to think about.

My recent abroad time has provided confirmation of a few long held things I have thought.

One of which is why call a rose by any other name Bonaparte?

I have been doing a bit of nosing around about Napoleon. Napoleon is fabulous and He is big in France btw.

He was 183.5 cm tall

Didn't like his portraits done in full profile, he preferred a 3/4.

He liked simple furniture, travel, horses, dogs, gardens, a challenge and some people.

He had a horse called Celestine. She carried him over the alps to one of his victories. The Austrian one I think

He read the art of war and decided to improve the world.

He changed her name from Rose to Josephine.

He also rebuilt the louvre after he and his mates made a mess of it.

Did I mention I love the louvre?

The paintings are .......

 

So telling

So so revealing and suggests a hint of worry

oh of no not that again even.

 

Some suggest a hint of skylarking....

" Hold it by the horns and let the others have a go" As a lass from my shy Persons softly does it walking tour of the lourve group called out.

A little embarassment pour moi

And the sculptures

This one is undated

L'date au Mercury.....

ahh, the light is right.

Believe this or not. The photographer is an art gallery owner from Philadelphia. His name is David Mitchell 111.

True story.

I love a statue.

 

they even have temporary exhibitions at the Louvre during July.

This looks real doesn't it?

It is made from cardboard and gelatin and food dye. It is called ...peut s'appuyer sur i-vous

 

Back to Josephines husband.

He was a complicated man

 

But he had an eye for detail.

this is one of his favorite paintings. The right cheek is slightly fuller than the left. How graceful.

And

he is regarded as the creator of the famous Exactly Syndrome joke. According the book " a secret Paris" when General bonaparte first saw this painting being painted he was heard to comment "mon dieu her face looks exactly like her arse".... The model was not within hearing range.

Stomach cancer or arsenic got him at 51.




he would have loved the pyramide.

The pyramide superbe n'est ce pas.




 

The flags waved au revoir.




Until the next.....

marcher ami hauteur


 

 

Pad Thai for lunch Tuesday.